My name is Taz, and this is the story of my retirement from active duty to civilian life as a service dog. My hashtag is #tazoteausmc and this is Day 100.
Mom says I’m an incorrigible moron and that if I was ever trained to do anything it didn’t stick. I have new friends, though. Leave That Leave That Leave That and Goddamit Zeus meet me at the park to run and play. We race around and catch frisbees and we love to find fleas and ticks and bring them home.
On Tuesday I ate everything in the big can in the kitchen while the humans were asleep, and now they’re mad at me and all they let me eat is boiled chicken and rice with pumpkin. It’s gross. The stuff in the big can is so much better. Please send me taco. They’re starving me. We drive past Taco Bell all the time and Mom won’t stop the car even when I howl.
I want to go back to the beach. Mom says soon. Very soon. She promises.