“Why do Mormons merry zombies?”
My eyes fly open. He’s sitting on the floor next to my bed, and it’s 5:30AM.
“No. What? What are you talking about? Why are you awake?”
“Sister Sheila is a bride of Christ, right?”
In my head: BBQ. Just BBQ. It’s gonna be one of THOSE mornings.
In reality: “Yes, she told you that.”
In my head: Darn you, Sheila, and your “I live with 50 Brides of Christ and you think your life is hard” comments!
“Well, then Sister Kathleen is a bride who merried Jesus, too. And SisterNancyCoyle. And Sister Maryanne. And Sister Jo. And SisterTerrorants.”
I sigh. “Terencia.”
“Her. And if all of them merried Jesus they’re Mormons. Cause Mormons merry lots of people, right? So Jesus has lots of wifes. And since he’s dead in heaven, he’s a zombie. So the sisters are Mormons who merry zombies, right? Is Jesus a Mormon, too? Or just a zombie? Was Lazarus a zombie, too? Did he have lots of wifes? Were they Mormons?”
In my head: OMG. Really? At 5:30AM? If it were not for the fact that there are 11 lovely kids, a wonderful teacher and an assistant (poor Sister Georgeann) in your Kindergarten class, I’d put you in public school. Where did you even hear the word “Mormon”?
In reality: “Mommy needs some coffee.”
Happy Tuesday, Facebook!